REMAKES Blog Fest: The Music

Hosted by Alex J. Cavanaugh and Heather M. Gardner.

Remakes – most of them suck. Now and then, one comes along that is as good as, if not better, than the original. And after all of the bad ones we’ve endured, we want to know about some good ones.
On November 13, 2017, blog about your favorite remake: movie (or television show into movie and vice versa), song, or book – or all three! Post a YouTube video and links where we can find these treasures. Tell us why THIS remake doesn’t suck!

Full list of pariticipating blogs at the bottom of this post.

THE MUSIC!

I love covers. Absolutely adore them. So much that I will often listen to musical genres I don't even usually like if someone has a new and interesting take on an old tune. I am unabashedly a fan of "Grey's Anatomy" covers of old pop songs. The show has made an industry out of indy-acoustic remixes of 80s pop hits, and I have Spotify playlists full of them. I also have an unusual number of bluegrass songs on my iPod, but all of them are covers of heavy metal or mid-2000s emo punk bands.

The best for me is when the artist takes a drastically different spin on a classic riff, like turning a slow ballad into thrash metal or remaking a hardcore hip hop song into something romantic. As with any kind of remake, it only works when you have something new to say. Just redoing the same thing the same way it was done before is boring. It's why covers of holiday classics are usually terrible - it's just a soulless rendition of the same thing we've heard a thousand times before.

Baby It's Cold Outside
Cover by CeeLo Green & Christina Aguilera

"Baby It's Cold Outside" is already an awful song for obvious reasons, but the recent Christina Aguilera/CeeLo Green cover made me want to claw my eyes out. It's just two very talented singers, who are obviously not even recording in the same room, trying to out-sing each other. There's no fun, no new take, nothing interesting about it. I supposed you could argue that about a lot of Holiday music, but then most holiday songs are covers, so I wonder why that works out, huh?

Anyway, on to the good stuff...

Love Will Tear Us Apart
Originally by Joy Division, covered by Nouvelle Vague

Quick story: I first heard Nouvelle Vague at a restaurant when I was out to dinner with my wife and in-laws. I loved the music they were playing so much that I asked the waiter what they were playing and immediately went out and bought the CD. I never do that, either talk to people or buy CDs, so that tells you how much I love this band.

Nouvelle Vague is french for "new wave," and it the name of a French group that almost exclusively covers "new wave" music from the 70s and 80s (like Joy Division, Depeche Mode, & New Order) with bossa nova beat (which itself is Portuguese for "new wave"), Besides being an awesome play on words, the musical arrangements are outstanding, and provides a wonderful background soundtrack to lounging around at a classy cocktail party. I always feel so continental when I listen to this stuff.

I'm Afraid of Americans
Originally by David Bowie, covered by O.R.K.

This is one of my favourite David Bowie songs, probably because it was heavily influenced by Trent Reznor during Bowie's dalliance with industrial music in the 1990s. My two favourite artists, together at last? What could be better?

Well, after the tragic events of November 8, 2016, I figured a cover of this song HAD to happen, and sure enough it only took about 6 months to come to light. While I prefer the actual musical arrangement in Bowie's original and Nine Inch Nail's remix, O.R.K.'s version makes the single most important musical change of this decade by swapping all the references to generic American "Johnny" with "Donny" in the lyrics instead.

Donny wants a plane
Donny wants to suck on a Coke
Donny wants a woman
Donny wants to think of a joke
Donny's in America
Donny's in America
Donny looks up at the stars
Donny combs his hair
Donny wants pussy in cars
Donny's in America

I'm still waiting to see if A Perfect Circle come out with an ever better cover when their inevitable new album drops. Their eMOTIVe album of anti-war cover songs, released during the height of W's presidency, was outstanding.

While I'm on the topic, I might as well throw this one out there:

Imagine

Originally by John Lennon, covered by A Perfect Circle

(Warning: Some graphic content and disturbing images)

Some folks might be a bit miffed on such a skewed take on a classic, hopeful song, but I think the material was open for it. Not to mention I'm a sucker for anything Maynard James Keenan does.

Imagine has always been a hopeful, positive song, asking us to picture the amazing things that people could do in a perfect world. A Perfect Circle twists this meaning, talking about the wonderful things people are capable of but reminding us that they're not doing it. The dissonant key and the minor chords in this just hit you right in the heart (even without the disturbing video above). It's a melancholy, bittersweet take on that hopeful message. It's ironic and almost mocking, as if to say, "Hey wouldn't it be great if we could get along? Too bad we never will."

Ice Ice Baby
Original by Vanilla Ice, cover by Richard Cheese

Okay, just so we don't go out on a total bummer, please enjoy the smooth stylings of Richard Cheese.

Now, to be fair, Richard Cheese is a lot like Nouvelle Vague. It's all jazzy lounge music, though instead of covering one particular style of music, he'll do anything and everything - hip hop, metal, 80s pop, TV theme songs, anything that's fun. Here's the thing: Richard Cheese is, technically speaking, a novelty act, but he's a great singer and always surrounds himself with talented musicians and awesome arrangements, so even though he's doing it tongue-in-cheek, the songs are amazing.

Anyone who knows me knows that I love it when people don't take themselves or their art too seriously, so someone who names himself after smegma and make nu-metal songs palpable is okay in my book.

Check out some of the other great blogs participating today:

Hell Comes to Hogtown: The Soundtrack

For those who missed it, my new book Hell Comes to Hogtown was released last week to much fanfare. It's available now from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, iTunes, Smashwords and many others, so you should go immediately to your online retailer of choice and pick up a copy. Then come back here and listen to these songs while you read it. It will greatly improve your overall experience.

I can't speak for other writers, but I listen to music constantly when I write, and certain songs tend to burrow into my brain and insinuate themselves into my writing. I've said before that my first book, Ten Thousand Days, was basically inspired by A Perfect Circle's song "Sleeping Beauty." I don't have a single song this time around had that kind of impact, but I actually have enough songs that are meaningful to the story that I can come up with an entire album.

Some of these tunes I listened to while I wrote and they affected my frame of mind and thus affected my writing. Some of them just strike me as being appropriate to the story. Either way, it's a fun little exercise and maybe it will help you understand the theme and the atmosphere I'm going for in my book. Or maybe you'll just get to listen to the fun tunes.

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"Zombie Night" by Trastorners

This is the music from the trailer. I wanted something both dark and humorous that fit with the theme of the piece (I also wanted something that was royalty free so take that for what it's worth). It may not capture what I was going for exactly, but it's close. There's another song by this band I wanted to use, but it was too familiar and people would have associated it too closely with something else. SPOILER WARNING: The book doesn't actually have anything to do with zombies.

"Conditions of my Parole" by Puscifer

This is the theme for Act I, and quite accidentally, it nearly tells the plot of the book. It was not at all planned, because I hadn't heard this song until I was nearly finished the manuscript, but there are several lines in "Conditions of My Parole" that nearly spoil the story. I don't know why I'm including it except that were Hogtown be made into a movie, this would actually make a great theme song, like the Bond themes of old.

"Applause" by Lady Gaga

This is the only song that's actually mentioned by name in the book. It's the entrance music for Dee, one of the main characters. He's a professional wrestler, and it's the song that plays when he makes his way down to the ring. It's perfect because the idea of living your life on stage and doing everything for "The Applause" is EXACTLY Dee's motivation. He's a narcissist and everything he does is for attention. Plus it's a really catchy tune.

"Dear Brother" by Puscifer

This is the theme of Act II, when the story gets darker. It's about raising a drink to fallen brothers, and cursing "the reaper (who) slips right past us/the bastard stole your breath away." It's a little more introspective, a little more serious than "Conditions of My Parole," which follows the pace of the book nicely.

"The Heart's Filthy Lesson" by David Bowie

The villain's theme. The creepy demon hobo holds many dark secrets in his heart, and he knows everyone else's secrets as well. He's dark and dissonant and discordant, just like the song. It's about death and loss and longing, but also about having a sick sort of admiration for the beauty of murder and destruction. About holding dark desires in one's heart. Plus it's just an awesome song, and I had to include David Bowie somewhere.

"Kalopsia" by Queens of the Stone Age

Kalopsia is a condition, state or delusion in which things appear more beautiful than they are. This is the theme of Act III, which is where our hero Fitz discovers so many things aren't what they seem. Things that seemed beautiful turn ugly, the world he thought he understood is turned upside down, and he's forced to reevaluate parts of his life and relationship that he's held true for years. The pace of the song is also perfect for the up-and-down roller coaster of the last few chapters. The song goes from low, dreamy and confusion valleys to soaring, powerful peaks, keeping you off balance and reeling, just like our hero.

"Chelsea No 2" by Rufus Wainwright (Leonard Cohen Cover)

This is Alexandre Croteau's theme. Alex is one of the RCMP officers chasing down Fitz and Dee and one of the main players in the story. I knew I wanted to include a Rufus Wainwright song, it was either this one or Montauk. I always imagine this song in one of the book's violent, deadly fights toward the end. It's incredibly incongruous but gives a chilling and sorrowful undertone to the violence. I could totally picture that scene in a movie in slow-motion, shot like a choreographed dance number, with a slow love song playing at graphic violence in the centre.

"A Drowning" by How to Destroy Angels

Ariadne's theme. She is the woman that enters the comic shop and turns Fitz's life upside down, and she is destined for a dark fate right from the beginning. Her mysterious, painful past is only hinted in the story, but the bits that we do see are heartbreaking enough.

"The Munsters" by Trastorners

And here's the other song I alluded to at the top. If Hogtown was a movie, this is the song that would play over the closing credits. Despite the heavy nature of most of the music, it is a funny book with strong elements of comedy, and I wanted to include that somewhere. The goofiness of the Munsters' theme song just provides such a nice dichotomy to the heavy-handedness of the rest of the contract.

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THE BOOK!

Title: Hell Comes to Hogtown

Author: C.D Gallant-King

Genre: Comic Horror

Length: 65,000 words

Cover Art: Jason Salvatori and Max Covers

Editing: Amy Allen-MacLeod

Release Date: July 1, 2016

Fitz is a broke night manager for a grubby comic book store. His only friend Dee is a drugged-out, womanizing pro-wrestler. Together they’re the most pathetic losers on the face of the planet. Their lives cannot possibly get any worse.

And then they’re implicated in the kidnapping of the prime minister’s wife.

On the run from the cops, Fitz and Dee discover there is something far worse than the RCMP stalking the dark streets of Toronto. They are being hunted by an ancient demon of unspeakable evil with an insatiable taste for blood... or maybe it’s just your run-of-the-mill giant murderous hobo?

Either way, life in prison might be better than whatever the creepy drifter has in store for them…

THE LINKS!

You can purchase Hell Comes to Hogtown at any of the fine retailers below:

AMAZON.COM | AMAZON.CA | AMAZON.CO.UK

KOBO | BARNES & NOBLE | iTUNES
CREATESPACE | SMASHWORDS | GOODREADS

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